C'est Cheese!

 

 

 

Eminem Haikus
by
Sugarbear 

 

Fuck fuck, fucking fuck
Dre understands me
What rhymes with fuck?

"I am whatever you say I am"
How the money keeps coming
Do you like my $800 shoes?

Downloading audio!
Oh how I love MP3s
Why did Britney reject me?

At last, my big break!
Fuck, shit, fuck, fuck
Why donít they let me on TV?

I hate my critics
I hate my fans
Will you buy my record?

"Hi, my name is- "
Wait, no one cares
Fuck! Fuck! Will you blow me?

I canít shit without someone standing by me
You can call me an asshole! Iím glad!
Why do I have three names?

Boy/Girl groups make me sick
Oh how I hate faggots!
If a guy blows me, does it make me gay?!

Faggot, fuck, shit, cock, fuck
And they said dropping out was bad?
Whatís my name, bitch?!

Iíll kick your ass!
You can sue me for a wardrobe.
What does an accountant do?

Detroit player spitting on your onion rings
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
Hey, who is he?

I hate my wife
I like to rap
Why is my mom suing me?

Donít fuck wití Shady or heíll kill you
Slim Shady wants you to suck his fucking cock!
Why do they want me in counseling?

Kim, Haley, Marshall Mathers.
Now everyone knows me
Should I have have my number un-published?

I beat my wife
I disgrace my family
What is a stenographer, your Honor?

"Track 6"
I copy Quentin Terantino
Fuck fuck fuck fuck
Does Dre wanna blow me?

Carson Daley and Fred Durst
How I fantasize
May I suggest Track 12?

I am mad and fucking pissed
My life is fucking hard
Is the limo ready?

DidoÖ almost sounds like dildo
Ha ha. Suck my dick.
Does drug abuse affect maturity growth?

Peroxide is expensive.
I like to grab myself.
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.