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Slam Book Fever! - Page Nine
March 2002

Best Outfit (formal)
Jessica’s blue silk dress that she wore to the Morrows’ fancy party. I can’t tell you how many blue silk (or, more likely, rayon) dresses I tried to find in my teen years to match my mental picture of that blue silk dress….

Runner up: The Wakefield twins’ great-great Aunt Samantha’s 1920s wedding dress. Kewl!

Best Outfit (informal)
Early Olivia Davidson in her flowered cotton skirt with a “loose, man-sized cotton shirt belted over” it, along with a rawhide-and-bead necklace and long silver earrings. So yeah, I dig the hippie look. Sue me!

Worst Outfit (formal)
Jessica’s fairy princess pink sparkly full-skirted dress that she wore for the Miss Teen Sweet Valley beauty pageant. Since when would JESSICA wear something so sweet and nice? I mean, pageant or no, wouldn’t she want to look sexy? Face it, that pink dress was right up Liz’s alley….

Runner up: Liz’s silver lamé puffy-sleeved bubble-skirt dress from the Winter Carnival Snow Ball.

Worst Outfit (informal)
Liz in All Night Long (pub. 1983, FYI) Long-sleeved t-shirt, worn jeans, moccasins…? Dudes, in 1983, that was how the stoner kids at my school dressed!

Worst Costume
Ahhh, with all the costume parties and dances in Sweet Valley, it still has to be Liz and Todd as the sun and the moon. May I please have a bag to yack in?

Runner up: Lila as Princess Di. At EVERY costume party for TEN YEARS, it seemed Lila was dressed up as Princess Di.

Best Costume
Jessica and Sam as Princess Leia and Han Solo.



It’s time to chaaaange….

Best Makeover
Gosh, this one’s a toss-up. On one hand, there’s The New Jessica, a.k.a. “Jessa Fields.” Dudes, this rocked! Jessica goes all Pseudo-Euro Sophisticate! This was the type of Magical Transformation I longed for. She dyes her hair black, straightens it, cakes on the pre-goth makeup, and starts dressing all cutting-edge chic in leather and 3-inch heels. But then on the other hand, Daniella Fromage/Magenta Galaxy was pretty freakin’ spectacular, too… between the clothes, the personalities, and, oh, the NAMES…! Grooby!

Worst Makeover
The Makeover Motif got to be really old. From Robin Wilson to Caroline Pierce, unliked/unlikable girls were made tolerable—even popular—by some dabs of eye shadow and a new blouse. A makeover will transform a Nobody into a Somebody… AND snag them a guy in the process. Bet on it. Lynn Henry’s (#28 Alone in the Crowd) was pretty bad because of COURSE all it takes is a hairstyle and some makeup and a change out of baggy jeans into trendy clothes to turn a seriously homely girl into someone attractive.

Runner up: Robin Wilson loses a million pounds in a couple of weeks and becomes Homecoming Queen! Because all it takes for a slovenly fat girl to be accepted and popular and loved is a good crash diet. And lip gloss.

Most Dated Moment
What would we NEVER see if the SVH series began in 2001 (or even 1991)?

Try Jessica out doing her hip-swinging walk in SVH #1 to attract attention from passing cars. Because a good way for young girls to learn self-esteem is to encourage whistles and cat-calls from horny boys driving by. Uh-huh, uh-huh.

Not to mention… Enid and George doing all those “bennies.” Um, how Fast Times at Sweet Valley High!

Also:  Mr. Collins and Ms. Dalton’s hot romance… carried out at school to the delight of all the students, I might add. In this day and age, we’d NEVER see two teachers dancing all romantically at the Homecoming dance. For that matter, a teacher would never have students baby-sit his small son, either…. Big trouble with the administration!

Most Full-Circle Dated Factor
What started off kinda kewl, became out of date, and now has come around to be almost kewl again? “The Droids.” What a name for a band. It worked in 1982… but not for long. But now, dare I say TWENTY YEARS LATER? “The Droids” sounds all retro-hip, huh?

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